Who knew your new favorite hoodie would feel like a hug from someone who actually gets it?
This isn’t your average “inspirational gym hoodie.” This is the unofficial uniform of post-shift decompression, rig bay naps, and “I swear I was off an hour ago” energy.
Soft as hell. Tough where it counts. And built with just enough room to hide your regrets, snacks, or both.
It’s got the warmth you need when the tones hit at 3 a.m., and the pouch pocket big enough to carry sarcasm, burnout, and whatever your rookie forgot to bring.
• 100% cotton face — soft enough to feel like forgiveness
• 65% ring-spun cotton, 35% polyester — durability + comfort
• Front pouch pocket — stash your hands, snacks, or trauma
• Self-fabric patch on the back — subtle, functional, station-clean
• Matching flat drawstrings — no weird plastic ends
• 3-panel hood — no pointy gnome head
• Blank product sourced from: Pakistan
⚠️ Heads-Up:
This hoodie runs small.
Like “that incident report better be short” small.
Order one size up for a proper fit — unless you like that “washed it once and now it’s a crop top” look.
No eagles. No bench-pressing liberty. Just comfort, sarcasm, and warmth for the ones who run cold from caffeine, chaos, and questionable life choices.
Made to last.
Made for the cursed.
Made for the ones who show up anyway.
This product is made especially for you as soon as you place an order, which is why it takes us a bit longer to deliver it to you. Making products on demand instead of in bulk helps reduce overproduction, so thank you for making thoughtful purchasing decisions!
